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Thursday, December 31, 2015

To a 2016 of Baby Steps



I always write a blog for New Year's Eve. Always.

But, yet, this is what I posted on my personal Facebook page yesterday.

"I have exactly 34 hours to figure out how to be a healthier, more organized, productive person so that 2016 is better than 2015. I can't take the pressure. How about for 2016 I just vow to eat a tad less cheese dip?"

Isn't this so true? Sometimes when we put pressure on ourselves, things don't end well. We set ourselves up for disaster.

So here is what I am going to say for 2016. Let's go a little easier on ourselves. Let's be kinder and gentler  to ourselves and others. 

Take that nap. Don't stress over that snack you are supposed to take to Bunco, Publix will do it for you!

(If you secretly hate your Christmas elves, it's okay to stop. Let 2016 be the year your elves go to live with Jesus.  It really is okay y'all. I promise.) I see all these people agonizing and complaining about the dang elves and I think, "Guys, you know the elves aren't real, right?"
Will the kids be a little disappointed? Maybe? Mine weren't. Couldn't have cared much less. But even if they are a little disappointed, it's probably nothing that a Kit-Kat won't fix. Or better yet, let the kids take turns staging the elves and surprising their siblings. It's a win-win for everyone.

So, here are some of my thoughts for 2016.

Let's think of and not forget the small things that illicit happiness. And do more of *that* this year.

Now, obviously the most important things in life are a relationship with God, family, and friends. Those are absolutely THE most important things in life. And any effort to improve those areas is always a major success. They trump everything else.

But right now I'm trying to also think of the smaller, less obvious things, as well. Maybe some are even seemingly insignificant things that somehow, in some way, make life better.

I have begun thinking of my "things." The little things that can oddly enough, pack a big punch, when it comes to my personal happiness.

1. Books

It's been said that a person who reads lives many different lives. Who said that? Someone said that. And it was one smart cookie. I cannot tell you how much I believe this. I feel so lucky to be a reader and to be able to experience so many things that I wouldn't if I didn't read. There are those who don't get it. "Why do you care about reading a fiction story that isn't even real?" Well, it's amazing, not only because I get to experience an adventure I wouldn't otherwise experience, but books help me understand myself better. That sentence you read and think, "Yes! This is exactly how I feel! And the author has put it into the exact words I have always felt but not been able to define!" Well, that is priceless!
So, reading? Yep, I'm doing even more of it.

2. Reasonably clean house

As gut wrenching as it is for me to admit this, I do feel better, mentally, when my space is reasonably clean. It's taken me 43 years to admit this. And there are times I run unnecessary errands that I strongly suspect is really a diversion from my cluttered living space. I think I may sometimes hide from my house. Or actually flee from it like an ax wielding murderer. So, I guess I'm going to try to get a handle on this. But baby steps.


3. Exercise

Let me be clear. I will not pressure myself to exercise. If I make a set list of things I must do, I've already failed. Maybe I have a rebellious nature and resist things I am *supposed* to do. So I will tell myself I do not HAVE to exercise. Maybe I should even tell myself I am not allowed to exercise. "Oh yeah, I will walk if I want to!!!!" Not sure how to tackle this one, but I do think it starts with something you enjoy and something that doesn't seem like a chore. All of you people who love to hit the gym? Power on sistas! That will never be me. Never. But, I do love to dance. Love it. So that's my first clue I suppose.


4. Water

You would have thought when the woman giving me a facial a few years ago told me that the little lines she was seeing by my eyes weren't actual wrinkles but rather lack of water and could be plumped right up, well, you would think I would have guzzled Lake Michigan by now. But for whatever reason, drinking water is extremely difficult for me. I remember one time in my life where I totally felt like a new person. I was out of the country for a week and felt the best I have ever felt in my life. I've tried to think on this, and was saddened to realize that I think it has to do with water. That week I was drinking lots of clean water because it was safer than risking the foreign ice cubes that might be put into my Cokes that could cause stomach issues. I've racked my brain trying to think of other reasons I felt so fantastic that week, but have come up empty handed other than the fact that I was finally drinking water and not dragging myself around dehydrated half the time. Unless,
there is a hidden benefit to pizza and gelato from the French Riviera which is entirely possible in my hopeful world. More water and more pizza (just to be safe.)

5. More movies

Okay, so this one is silly, but why on earth do I not go to the movies more than I do? I LOVE movies- especially scary ones. There is something about seeing a fictional girl (who unfortunately will be showing the obligatory cleavage), while running from something scary, and will twist her ankle and fall. There is something cathartic about thinking, "Wow, I'm so glad I'm not her!!" More popcorn?

6. More sleep

I hate admitting this one to myself perhaps the most. And this one directly conflicts with number one on this list. Because I love reading late into the night. Love. It. I am a night owl. I love the night. I come alive at night! But the real world doesn't seem to want to work with me on I this one. So it seems I'm going to have to cave a little. Maybe just an hour more.

7. Writing- or whatever makes your heart soar.

I'm a firm believer that if you aren't using your gift, then you aren't truly happy. Period. The end. You have your gift for a reason. Whether it's gardening or drawing or working with animals or painting or hiking- go do it. It makes you...you.


That's it. My small list. My baby-steps list. I'm going to see if small things can yield big results. More happiness. Less stress. Low pressure. And if these things work, I might up my game. And really, if I'm working on all of these things, there really isn't a need to cut back on cheese dip at all. is there?

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Sameness




     I met a stranger today. An older man. I have made a point and been extremely careful not to post anything political on Facebook or to get in political debates of any kind, (not simply because I have no desire to, but also because as a person who many times sides with each party on different things), I have found myself feeling actually confused and defeated by all of the political opinions swirling about lately. 
     When I first began talking to this man, I quickly assessed that we would have nothing in common. I knew we differed politically, and knew after a week of being under the weather that I felt too sick to debate. I wondered where on earth this conversation was going to go. But almost 45 minutes later I was shocked. Even though on the surface,  and possibly after a brief five-minute conversation, you might have thought that there is nothing we would agree on whatsoever. No point in talking.

But after a totally respectful, calm, friendly, 45-minute conversation, I realized he and I are hardly different at all. We agreed on so much more than I realized. We would have never figured that out with a superficial conversation, or a heated moment, or a quick sound bite, or a Facebook post. 
     But after our sometimes deep, and thoughtful conversation, I feel like we walked away feeling that we are on the same team, and I was shocked by our similarities.
     I truly felt energized and even hopeful after our conversation.
     I wonder if the majority of us aren't really, deep down where it counts, on the same side, but in the "lashing out" that seems so common these days, things get totally twisted and misunderstood.
     Away from the TV media, and the baited questions, and social media, I'll bet we are so much more united than we even realize.



Sunday, October 18, 2015

Control/Alt/Delete


When I was a baby, my mom used to think I was asleep. 

But as soon as she stood up to put me in my crib, I relentlessly forced myself awake, looking around feverishly, scared I was missing something interesting.

I'm still very much like that. It is my strength and my weakness.

My motto is always "count me in." I love people, I love experiences. Basically, I love life.

Family grill out? Yes! Big group at the pool for swimming and pizza? Of course! Road trip? Yes! Where? Any gathering with cheese dip? You betcha! 

Let's experience everything life has to offer!

But once in a while, you get a wake up call.

We all have those weeks, and a couple of weeks ago was mine. Long story short, in one week my son's trombone, iPad, book bag with notes, and PE clothes were stolen out of my car. That same week I locked my husband's keys in his truck and stranded our entire family at Target for hours before we finally had to call a locksmith and ended up paying three times what we were expecting. In the same week, we very unexpectedly found a cute place at the lake that we could afford and wrote a check and made an offer on the spot. I was so excited about this new opportunity for our family. However, our offer wasn't turned in by the realtor and the lake place was unexpectedly swiped out from under us later that night.

All within a few days.

Now, I know what you're thinking, and I thought it as well. In the scheme of things, none of this is that important. We are happy and healthy and together and fed. Life truly is good. I have absolutely nothing to complain about.

But even though I logically knew that, I still felt down, and then felt kicked while I was down. 

I tried to keep perspective, and my mood soon lifted. One day I was folding laundry and noticed I was humming. Now, I don't know about you guys, but laundry and humming don't usually go hand in hand in my house. Muttering grouchy things under my breath maybe, but not humming.

Not. Ever.

But I soon realized what was different about this laundry time.

I wasn't rushing.

I wasn't digging through clean clothes, not yet put away, piled on the love seat in our "fancy room", (AKA- the room we never go into unless we can't find a clean washcloth). I wasn't hurriedly cleaning the house for a get together that night. No one would be coming over a few hours later. I also wasn't quickly folding laundry hoping that the baseball pants my son needed in a few hours would be in there.

I was simply doing laundry. In the moment. Nowhere to go. No place to be. That is why I was humming.

I wasn't rushing.

It soon hit me why the week had taken such a toll. Sure, it was upsetting to have things stolen, and be out so much money. To lock the keys in the car and have to pay even more just to get inside our own vehicle.

But those things had happened because of rushing. THAT was the most frustrating.

If we hadn't been rushing, we probably would have grabbed the bag and iPad and trombone out of the car. If we hadn't been rushing, I would have thought to lock the car. If I hadn't been rushing, I would have been more focused and "in the moment", and wouldn't have locked the keys in the car.

If I hadn't been rushing.

When did everything become such a rat race?

It seems like every minute of the day is multitasked.

Brushing teeth while returning email? Answering texts on the way to the ballgame? Working on a Halloween costume while watching a movie? Going over the weeks calendar while eating lunch?

It can sap the peace right out of you.

I feel like I need to be rebooted. A reset. I need to hit control/alt/delete.

This weekend we are taking a step back. I'm calling it a mental health weekend. 

If we don't consciously take control of our lives, our lives will take control of us.

And that's when we get short fused, forget things, stop truly enjoying life.

Sometimes taking care of yourself and your family requires smiling and saying, "Thanks, but no."

Peace doesn't just happen. We have to make it happen.

Yes, if you don't go to the ball game, your children won't get to run around with their friends and you might miss an exciting game. Yes, if you don't go to the carnival, you might have to wait until next season to experience the ferris wheel. If you don't meet up with people to go bowling and out to eat, you might miss some great laughs with friends. 

If you don't always go, you will miss some things. Probably some fun things.

But what if you DO make a point to sometimes say no and miss out on the big fun stuff. Well, you might notice your sons being bored and deciding to play hide and seek with each other, or your older son giving your younger son some baseball pointers in the backyard. You might enjoy your whole family lazily piled up on the couch watching a movie and drinking Oreo milkshakes. You might find your child curling up beside you on the porch and asking you to read to him. You might go with the family on an after dinner walk on a crisp, cool night when the moon and stars are so bright you don't even need streetlights. You might sit around the backyard fire pit and tell scary stories, or relax in front of a crackling fire. 

And that is not missing out on anything.


Sunday, September 27, 2015

Ode to the Fresh Moms



Please don't diss us, younger sisters. 

We are the older, tired moms.

We have BEEN there, and we have DONE that, and frankly we are exhausted. We are 40-something Velveteen rabbits, and though we are loved, our ears are a little torn and our fur is a little matted from all of our years of service. We are leaps and bounds smarter, but more exhausted,  than our former selves.

We KNOW things. They are like ancient Chinese secrets within us. When you young ones bounce in with all of your fresh energy, and special back-to-school Pinteresty things, and baskets of fall gourds that look like cute Halloween spooks, (and did I mention all of your energy?), well, you just go girl!! We are rooting you on! We are passing the baton to YOU!!!! Monogram and Pinterest on, sweet ladies!!!!

Some of us have done the room mom thing (SIX times to be exact), and the team mom thing, and the organizer of this, and the volunteer for that. We have sorted the papers twice a week, and delivered the Starbucks, and decorated the doors, and cut out the 3-D hexagons, and hung the footprint Christmas trees, and mastered the science slime, and blown up a picture of the chihuahua team mascot and hot glued it to a yard stick, and made 20 fruit kabobs because the boys bat better after cantaloupe for some reason. We have, in fact, *rocked* it.

But we are now a bit different from the moms we once were. We love our children more than life itself, but We ...Are...Tired.

Older moms may have more dark circles and a tad more back fat, but we are wise. Like, way wise.

We now know those hundreds of dollars we spent on our child's first birthday party were worthless. Oh, we aren't judging. Not by a long shot. I planned a first birthday party for my first child (close to Easter) where I baked a big bunny cake, decorated a cupcake with each child's initial on it, orchestrated a huge Easter egg hunt for all of the kiddos, decorated the house, and constructed a photo montage with a precious picture for each month of my child's life.

Oh yes, I did.

Do know how much of this he now remembers? 

Nada.

I should have actually bought a Publix cake, snapped some pics, and used all of that time, energy, and money toward a family vacation for all of us.

Live and learn.

So, young, energetic moms, we have been there before. We WERE you.

But we are now at the point in our mom life cycle, that sometimes just putting on makeup and fixing our hair makes us want to curl up in the fetal position.

Mom burnout is a real thing. Why else would everyone's second child's baby book still be blank?

We are now helping with things like actual algebra, and late night baseball tournaments, and figuring out how to fit a trombone on the bus.

We did all of the fantastic things in the name of being there and supporting our children and being involved. And it was great. It truly was. And it was important. It served it's purpose. 

But now, as our children get older, we find that our support and energy is needed in other ways.

Our children may have a project, two quizzes, and five tests in the span of a week, and frankly, we just don't have time to worry about construction paper cornucopias. But trust me, we wish we did. Fall crafts trump math pretty much ALWAYS.

There came a point for me when the laundry was piling up, and I desperately needed to go to grocery store...for like, food, and it was 1:30 in the morning, and I found myself thinking that the construction paper Weimaraners and dachshunds running a marathon on the class door would look so much cuter if they were wearing Nikes and Asics. It was then that I asked myself what in the fresh heck I was doing.

And sometimes when sitting there cutting out box tops that for some bloody reason some can't seem to cut along the perforated lines, and you are grumpy, and you could be playing Scattegories with your kids instead, you find yourself asking, is this really giving me *more* time with my kids?

Don't get me wrong, helping out, volunteering, being room mom and all that other stuff is important. Very important. But there also comes a time when you tell yourself enough is enough. You are older, and you are tired. It's time to back up and let some fresh blood give it a whirl. It's time to back off a bit, get into our hovering mommy-copters and blow this joint.

Let the younger ones hold down the fort. It's time for me to stop cutting out 1,732 valentines and do something about this mom arm fat that could give me a black eye when I wave.

So please, young energetic moms, don't judge us when we forget to turn in the money in time for the gift card tree you are whipping together or send in the gardening tools, tumbler filled with candy, or the sprinkles for the ice cream party a day late.

We know you've got it covered.

Because it used to be us with a whipped latte to be dropped off in one hand and an extra plain white T in tow in case one of the moms forgot.  

But this is your time now. And I respect the heck out of you. I salute you. Power on, Sister. 

I'll see you on the other side soon enough...when you have finally cursed under your breath with construction paper and scissors at 2 am for the absolute last time.

What you are doing is real. It's important. And it matters.

But there will come a point in your life when you are a more frayed Velveteen Rabbit mom, and at 9 pm you just want to watch Criminal Minds and eat Breyers out of the carton. 

And that's really okay. I promise.

You have earned it.


Monday, August 31, 2015

The Witching Hour



  
Sometimes as mothers, there are things for which we have no answers. Things we simply cannot figure out no matter how hard we try.

But sometimes, even though it may be wrong in a misery-loves-company sort of way, it makes us feel better to know that other moms are in one of these trenches suffering with us.

Or at least to imagine in our minds that they are- that we aren't the only ones.

I choose to believe that I'm not the only one whose hour after bus drop off is not one big tooth-gritting, chest tightening, semi panic attack, homework-apocalypse.

Let me explain.

First off, of COURSE I'm glad to see my children. It's not that at all. But there is something about the after school frenzy that makes me want to put a margarita into one of those obnoxious helmets with swirly straws that feed straight down your throat.

Of course I've never done that. But my kids aren't in high school yet...

Here is how it plays out.

I think perhaps they come in the door all tired of being calm and structured. There is a kicking off of the shoes and a slinging of the backpacks. Also, everyone enters the premises as if they have just been granted the Survivor feast after a week of fasting in the Congo. Dirty hands foraging through pantries and picking through cellophane. Apparently six years of telling them to wash their hands right when they walk in the door after school has not been absorbed by any of their neural transmitters.

Then there is the dog who usually grabs one of their shoes in his mouth and runs with it, just to make me scream. Every. Single. Day.

There is the talking over each other. There is the, "Can I go to (insert name)'s house?" or "Can (insert name) come over?" And randomness, "How long is an airplane ride from here to Louisiana?"

"But you need to do your homework."

"But I told (insert name) I was coming over."

Then, I am trying not to bark, "Well, by all means if you TOLD him then please go!!!!! There will be *plenty* of time for you to study for your subject-predicate test when you are both thirty on your moms' couches while we do your laundry because you wanted to hang with friends before you did your HOOOMMMEEEEWWWOORRKKK!

Yes, I'm exaggerating. 

My children make good grades. And sometimes after school I do feel a bit like Monica on that Friends episode where she is instructing everyone on how to correctly snap the tops on their Crayola markers.

I admit I have never been accused of being too laid back...

Especially not about school.

That would be my husband who said hello and hugged my child's teacher at the ballpark and didn't realize it was his last year's teacher. But I digress...

I'm a substitute teacher, for crying out loud. And I can calmly help someone struggling with reading or math with flying colors. I am the epitome of patience!

But when I am sitting there with my own child and he is reading to me and randomly throwing in words THAT ARENT EVEN THERE like he is on stage at Live at the Improv, I literally want to curl up in the fetal position and suck my thumb.

I think it's because we CARE soooooo much. We want them to thrive, and be successful, and be all that we know they can be. And we want them to WASH THEIR HANDS for crying out loud and not get strep on the third week of school!!!! 

And the knocks on the door, and the needing to start supper, and the dog barking at every person that walks by...well, that can only add to the fun.

Thankfully, after the witching hour, everything seems to settle down.

It's that one hour. And certainly I'm not the only one. Hopefully. Bueller?Lie to me if you must.

I have a friend who used to loudly sing whenever she got frustrated at her children. She figured that was better than yelling and provided a better memory for her kids. She may be on to something. 

But I'm not sure my scary mom face while belting out, "Come On Eileen" won't be a one-way ticket into therapy.

As moms, sometimes is hard not to care so much. It's hard to relax, go with the flow, and let the chips fall where they may.

I'm working on a "system" for after school. However, suffice it to say this system has been in the making for years.

But maybe just knowing there are other moms out there, feeling the same way, gritting their teeth, hair sticking to the back of their sweaty necks as they trudge through homework apocalypse every day, is a good place to start.

Semper Fi, Mom soldiers.

Subject and predicate onward.






Sunday, August 9, 2015

Advice for Middle School






  1. Nothing, absolutely NOTHING is as bad as it seems once the sun sets and rises again. A new day always brings a new perspective. 

That note I wrote about having a crush on a boy that was found and copied and posted all over the school? Yes, I laugh about it now. And possibly laughed about it a week after it happened, even though the day it happened I wanted the ground to swallow me up whole.

To quote Wilson-Phillips, "Hold On For One More Day."

Things get better. Always.

2. There will be kids in middle school who look like they may not be able to tie their own shoes and kids who look like they drove to school and voted in the last election. Be nice to everyone, it all evens out in high school.

3. Adopt a "more the merrier" attitude. Don't form exclusive cliques that purposefully leave others out, and do not try to join exclusive cliques. They are meaningless, and hurt other people's feelings.

Of course it's impossible to invite everyone to everything, but also help all of us parents, including myself, try not to do anything to encourage an "us" and "them" mentality. Sometimes it may be the parents, while trying to relive the glory days, who make things so much worse by trying to make sure our children are liked and included.

4. Realize that there is no group, club, team, grade, or clique that makes you who you are. Only the way you treat others defines who you are and is what truly counts once that graduation cap is tossed into the air.

5. The kids that act "too cool for school" and who bully and pick on and make fun of other kids? Many of them will still be sleeping on mama's couch into their 30s.

6. Try to be organized. A large factor in whether you succeed in middle school has to do with learning organization and responsibility.

7. Middle schooler, appreciate your parents. You aren't exactly the easiest person to be around at this time in your life.

8. No extra curricular activity, no matter how much you love it, is as important as academics. What if Lebron James had irreparable damage to his leg his senior year?

9. Learn to dance. It will come in handy so much more than you realize.

10. People who act better than you secretly feel inferior to you.

11. Treat everyone with kindness and respect because they may be going through something unimaginable, and your kindness could be the one thing that changes a life for the better.

12. Embrace quirkiness and weirdness in yourself and others. It's what makes people interesting.


13. Enjoy this time in your life. These are some of the most care-free days you will ever have. Some days will be doozies, but for the most part, these days may be some of the best. Enjoy!


Sunday, August 2, 2015

10 Random Things I Discovered This Summer



1. Regardless of how relaxing and wonderful and serene and refreshing your beach vacation has been, you will inevitably find yourself at Alvin's Island while your kids search fruitlessly amidst junk for their promised souvenirs, while you wish someone would put you out of your misery and knock you unconscious with a $3.99 wooden crab net.

2. And, never, ever, EVER take your child shopping for school supplies when you have PMS. And never, under any circumstances, take the little brother who may excitedly blurt out, "Maybe this will be the school year you will get your head shoved in the toilet!!!"

3. Whether or not a sudden storm blows in is directly proportional to how much junk you have dragged to the pool.

4. The people who decided summertime was a great time to air "American Ninja Warrior" should also provide a Damage Relief Team to travel the nation wiping shoe marks off of walls and fixing loose banisters.

5. When you're 43, trying to run across water in a hamster ball isn't fun. It's actually kind of sad.

6. At the end of the school year, whatever you vowed to do over the summer (and THIS time I'm serious): Teach all of the multiplication facts, read every single day, begin new chores for kids...
You will realize 10 days before school starts that you have started none of them. NONE.

7. You might develop odd physical symptoms toward the end of summer. Two of them may be a sensitivity to noise and twitching. And at the VERY end of the summer, you may get the same feeling in your chest that you get when you are trying to untangle a pile of wire hangers.

8.  When your children excitedly figure out that you can rip off the end of a Nerf dart and install a thumbtack which will stick to things far away at a high speed, including wood and mortar, it's definitely time for school to start.

9. If you do, in fact, let your children listen to the song Uptown Funk...A LOT, do not be surprised when you are scolding one of your children, and after you yell, "STOP!" that the child comes back with, "...wait a minute. Grab my cup, put some liquor in it..."

(^^^^^^Mom Of The Year^^^^^^)

10. And last but not least, you will realize that time is passing much too quickly. And you will realize that though your summer really didn't go according to plan and you didn't accomplish many of the things you had hoped you would, in its own way, the summer was still darn near perfect.



Tuesday, July 14, 2015

You've Got This

Mamas...I feel ya.

This is a shout out to all of those hot, sweaty mamas sitting in their cars in the 100-degree heat index at Sonic, watching their little ones growing up too fast. 

Watching them sitting there with their friends like they are so big and independent, while we still see dimpled fingers and sticky smiles.

This is for the moms who are so bloody tired and anxious and worn out from the summer frenzy that they just need a moment, just one peaceful moment with a friend, even if it's in a hot car watching their kids act big while they gulp down green apple slushies.

This is for all of the moms whose houses look like the Pittsburg Steelers threw a house party.

This is for all the moms who planned to have their children read for an hour every day of the summer and just realized it's only 29 days until school and they haven't even implemented the plan yet.

This is for all the moms looking at Facebook who think that the magnificent things posted are just "a day in the life" when really that might be the best that happened to that person all year.

This is for the moms who planned on being June Cleaver this summer and growing summer squash and maybe even canning something, only to find they may have come closer to channeling Roseanne.

This is for all the moms who are just doing their danged best, laughing one minute but feel that the laughter could also possibly turn into tears of frustration.

Because they just need 10 minutes of silence. Or one chapter. Or a margarita.

This is for my hero, the mom I saw a few days ago at Target who
had two boys wearing Avenger Age of Ultron voice changer masks. They were using robot voices and circling her like the raptors circled Chris Pratt in Jurassic World. 

She was simply trying to have a few solitary minutes on the phone with another mom. She didn't seem to get irritated at all. She is either from another state that just started their summer break, or I want to be her when I grow up.

She remained much more calm than I did when I was trying to find sulfate-free shampoo that also smelled masculine for my boys. I picked out four shampoos and simply wanted them to smell them and pick their favorite. This, theoretically, should have taken 45 seconds. 

But mine had to break the shampoo bottles into teams, like brackets in a baseball tournament, with one eventually coming out the winner. Right there in the middle of the dirty floor. And then my oldest had to change his winner in the end because his little brother picked the same one. We can't have anyone copying.

For. The. Love.

Summer can be such a paradox. So many of our best memories and sweetest moments we have with our families are in the sweet, sweet summertime.

And yet, sometimes the togetherness for so many consecutive days can cause nerves to be raw, irritations to be magnified, and noises to be louder and grate...grate...grate.

I heard an evangelist make this statement the other night on TV. He said the first step to cure depression is a meaningful conversation. But I believe it applies to the summer frenzies as well.

The first step to cure summertime frenzy and stress is a meaningful conversation with a friend.

Even if it's sitting all hot in sweaty in your car at Sonic.

Power through mamas. We are all in this together.





Friday, June 26, 2015

Too Loud


It's almost midnight, and I am outside sitting on my deck alone.

It is quiet out here.

Is it just me, or is everything too loud? I mean...EVERYTHING.

I feel like everyone just needs to stop talking, stop debating, stop analyzing, stop opinionating, stop being offended, stop arguing, just stop. And be quiet. And be still.

Just be.

And then I think everyone needs a group hug. 

Or maybe at least to sit across a table with good friends and not debate, but just laugh. Laugh loudly, deeply, raucously over something really funny.

Or maybe take a walk at dusk with someone you love, and talk about a great book you have just read.

Go watch a mindless movie, and fill up on popcorn and chocolate.

Everything has gotten too loud, too intense, too much. 

People's hearts are on their sleeves, and we are all bumping into each other.

It's okay not to debate. It's okay not to give an opinion on everything. It's okay to just stop, and breathe, and listen, and love.

Sometimes all you need to do is look into the face of a stranger. Maybe it's the face of someone a different color, of someone with different beliefs, of someone with a completely different background. 

But just smile. 

Not one of those quick, just passing through smiles. 

But a warm, sincere, smile that spreads across your face.

A smile that says, "We may be very different in a lot of ways, but I'll bet we are probably alike in a lot of ways too. And I want to brighten your day."

Sometimes, for a brief moment, it can be that simple.