When I was a baby, my mom used to think I was asleep.
But as soon as she stood up to put me in my crib, I relentlessly forced myself awake, looking around feverishly, scared I was missing something interesting.
I'm still very much like that. It is my strength and my weakness.
My motto is always "count me in." I love people, I love experiences. Basically, I love life.
Family grill out? Yes! Big group at the pool for swimming and pizza? Of course! Road trip? Yes! Where? Any gathering with cheese dip? You betcha!
Let's experience everything life has to offer!
But once in a while, you get a wake up call.
We all have those weeks, and a couple of weeks ago was mine. Long story short, in one week my son's trombone, iPad, book bag with notes, and PE clothes were stolen out of my car. That same week I locked my husband's keys in his truck and stranded our entire family at Target for hours before we finally had to call a locksmith and ended up paying three times what we were expecting. In the same week, we very unexpectedly found a cute place at the lake that we could afford and wrote a check and made an offer on the spot. I was so excited about this new opportunity for our family. However, our offer wasn't turned in by the realtor and the lake place was unexpectedly swiped out from under us later that night.
All within a few days.
Now, I know what you're thinking, and I thought it as well. In the scheme of things, none of this is that important. We are happy and healthy and together and fed. Life truly is good. I have absolutely nothing to complain about.
But even though I logically knew that, I still felt down, and then felt kicked while I was down.
I tried to keep perspective, and my mood soon lifted. One day I was folding laundry and noticed I was humming. Now, I don't know about you guys, but laundry and humming don't usually go hand in hand in my house. Muttering grouchy things under my breath maybe, but not humming.
Not. Ever.
But I soon realized what was different about this laundry time.
I wasn't rushing.
I wasn't digging through clean clothes, not yet put away, piled on the love seat in our "fancy room", (AKA- the room we never go into unless we can't find a clean washcloth). I wasn't hurriedly cleaning the house for a get together that night. No one would be coming over a few hours later. I also wasn't quickly folding laundry hoping that the baseball pants my son needed in a few hours would be in there.
I was simply doing laundry. In the moment. Nowhere to go. No place to be. That is why I was humming.
I wasn't rushing.
It soon hit me why the week had taken such a toll. Sure, it was upsetting to have things stolen, and be out so much money. To lock the keys in the car and have to pay even more just to get inside our own vehicle.
But those things had happened because of rushing. THAT was the most frustrating.
If we hadn't been rushing, we probably would have grabbed the bag and iPad and trombone out of the car. If we hadn't been rushing, I would have thought to lock the car. If I hadn't been rushing, I would have been more focused and "in the moment", and wouldn't have locked the keys in the car.
If I hadn't been rushing.
When did everything become such a rat race?
It seems like every minute of the day is multitasked.
Brushing teeth while returning email? Answering texts on the way to the ballgame? Working on a Halloween costume while watching a movie? Going over the weeks calendar while eating lunch?
It can sap the peace right out of you.
I feel like I need to be rebooted. A reset. I need to hit control/alt/delete.
This weekend we are taking a step back. I'm calling it a mental health weekend.
If we don't consciously take control of our lives, our lives will take control of us.
And that's when we get short fused, forget things, stop truly enjoying life.
Sometimes taking care of yourself and your family requires smiling and saying, "Thanks, but no."
Peace doesn't just happen. We have to make it happen.
Yes, if you don't go to the ball game, your children won't get to run around with their friends and you might miss an exciting game. Yes, if you don't go to the carnival, you might have to wait until next season to experience the ferris wheel. If you don't meet up with people to go bowling and out to eat, you might miss some great laughs with friends.
If you don't always go, you will miss some things. Probably some fun things.
But what if you DO make a point to sometimes say no and miss out on the big fun stuff. Well, you might notice your sons being bored and deciding to play hide and seek with each other, or your older son giving your younger son some baseball pointers in the backyard. You might enjoy your whole family lazily piled up on the couch watching a movie and drinking Oreo milkshakes. You might find your child curling up beside you on the porch and asking you to read to him. You might go with the family on an after dinner walk on a crisp, cool night when the moon and stars are so bright you don't even need streetlights. You might sit around the backyard fire pit and tell scary stories, or relax in front of a crackling fire.
And that is not missing out on anything.
